


Sweetness & Piss | Shoot Your Goo My Dude

by NedrynWrites, omgitsaddyc



Series: post act iii smut universe [2]
Category: Dragon Quest Series, Dragon Quest XI
Genre: Enthusiastic Consent, Established Relationship, Hero | Luminary is Named Eleven | El (Dragon Quest XI), M/M, Mute Hero | Luminary (Dragon Quest XI), OKAY I KNOW YOU'RE ZONED OUT BY NOW SO PAY ATTENTION TO THESE NEXT ONES, Omorashi, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, eleven's lube shooter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:34:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23728369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NedrynWrites/pseuds/NedrynWrites, https://archiveofourown.org/users/omgitsaddyc/pseuds/omgitsaddyc
Summary: Happy April Fools!Nedryn (Sweetness & Piss):In which Eleven is a thirsty flower and Erik needs to water him with his peeAddy (Shoot Your Goo My Dude):Please enjoy this short snip in which El discovers a new and quite useful ability.or: a continuation from one of many questionable SoS conversations.
Relationships: Camus | Erik/Hero | Luminary (Dragon Quest XI)
Series: post act iii smut universe [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1709095
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7





	Sweetness & Piss | Shoot Your Goo My Dude

**Author's Note:**

> Content warning for piss kink that's played semi unironically, in case you couldn't tell from the tags.
> 
> Shoutout to Flutiebear who I'm reluctant to mention in This for a swear used in Sweetness & Piss
> 
> Shoutout to Panda for both of our chapter names; we'd apologize for sullying them, but they were intentionally cursed from the get-go

**Sweetness & Piss**

Eleven ran his hands up and down Erik’s hips, so gently it almost distracted him from what they were doing. He fucked him good and slow from behind. Erik whined into the bedspread. His mind was a bit fuzzy from that bottle of wine he’d plowed through earlier, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to _get_ plowed. 

Eleven, every bit as gone (if not more, the lightweight) picked up speed. He went hard and fast, more so than he usually did, and much sooner, too. Not that Erik was complaining, even if it meant an early finish. 

He didn’t _mean_ to wet himself, but in his defense, Eleven should have let him go _before_ shoving him into the bed. And he was fucking him so hard, so fast, his bladder just… failed. He opened his mouth to tell Eleven so he wouldn’t have to find out himself. But it turned out to be harder than he thought; it was so good, he didn’t want to stop for just a little mess. 

Eleven took a deep inhale, and Erik cringed. But Eleven didn’t grind the whole thing to a halt in disgust. In fact, he seemed to be even _more_ into it. Eleven moaned, leaning closer forward. He took several deep inhales, to a point that it couldn’t have been anything but sniffing. 

_Is he into this?!_

Eleven’s hand wrapped around Erik’s dick, still piss-sticky, and they both moaned. 

_Am_ I _into this?!_

Pee made a horrible substitute for lube, but as far as his dick cared, it got the job done. Perhaps he could try it in his ass next time - though the blare of the lube police sirens silenced the thought. 

Eleven pounded him harder still, and Erik just let himself go. If he was going to wet the bed while they were having sex, might as well commit, right? If that didn’t gross Eleven out, nothing would. They were going to need a _long_ talk after this. 

And quite the opposite to what Erik half expected, Eleven shivered, a strangled moan Erik had only heard in his horniest of dreams. He didn’t know Eleven could sound _that_ turned on. 

_So this is what our crazy sex life has been missing,_ Erik thought deleriously. _No wonder Eleven looked so turned on when I was walking around covered in sewage all those years ago. Wait, did he fall for me because I smelled like pee for a few weeks?!_

The scent of a filthy bathroom filled the room, the sound of their aggressive coupling, their loud moans, and soon Erik’s spend joined the mess. Eleven wasn’t far after, shooting one _hell_ of a load. How did he have that much in him? 

Erik moaned at the cum entering his body. He’d always liked it when Eleven skipped the barrier spell; now he was full to the brim. He twisted his hips in fresh pleasure as Eleven pulled out. 

They gasped against the bedspread (the part that was free of bodily fluids, thankfully) for a good long while before they both bolted up in the same moment. 

“Motherfucking tentacular tits-” 

‘I’m so sorry-’ 

“No! No, you didn’t do anything wrong, that was on-” 

‘I can’t believe I kept going after you’d-’ 

“Seriously, it’s okay, I would have said something if I didn’t-” 

‘I can’t believe that turned me on-’ 

“What?!” 

Eleven flushed clear to the tips of his ears. ‘I thought… you could tell I was into it.’ 

Erik groaned, burying his face in his hands, mumbling something he knew Eleven had no hope of discerning. He knew he’d have to clarify, but he bought himself a whole few seconds. 

‘What?’ Eleven finally asked. 

“I said, I was into it too.” 

Eleven visibly relaxed. ‘So… if you’re into it… and I’m into it… who’s flying Cetacea?’ 

“Why did you have to bring the whale into this,” Erik groaned. “…Hey, have you ever seen Her-” 

‘Don’t finish that sentence.’ 

Erik chuckled. He scratched the back of his neck as he braced himself for what he was about to say. “I mean… as long as we both like it, and we clean up after ourselves, who cares if it’s not traditional?” 

Eleven nodded, still looking a bit as though he’d swallowed a lemon whole. 

“Nobody gets to define our sex life but us.” He put his hand on Eleven’s knee. “If you want, we can pretend it didn’t happen and never talk about it again. 

“Or-” he moved into Eleven’s space and lowered his voice- “we can do it again, better prepared. I’m down either way.” 

* * *

**Shoot Your Goo My Dude**

Erik sat at the edge of the stream with a huff. “You know you could just zoom us back to the castle.”

El sat beside him with a faint smile. ‘But where’s the fun in that? I thought you said you could keep directions by the stars.’

Erik crossed his arms over his chest. “I _can_ , I’m just better out at sea. The trees must be throwing me off. Why don’t we just stop for the night and camp out here? It’s been a while since we’ve slept under the night sky.”

It really had been. They’d gotten so accustomed to royal life that El honestly had a hard time remembering the last time they were out roughing it. The more he thought about it while he unlaced his boots and dunked his feet in the stream, the more he liked the idea.

‘Yeah. Let’s stay out here for the night.’

They made a decent camp with what they could find, and luckily El had packed for this very scenario. It’s not that he didn’t have faith in Erik’s abilities. Maybe this was his plan all along.

They laid out under the stars, dinner cooked over the fire and quickly consumed from their afternoon of traversing the forest. Erik cuddled into El’s side, pointing out a few of the constellations as El listening intently.

He’d pointed them out tens of times before, but El didn’t mind him explaining the legends and stories over and over again. He felt Erik’s hand begin to trail from around his waist down lower, resting on his hip. The more he spoke, the closer El felt his hand drift from his hip down to his thigh, gently massaging the sore muscles from their hike.

El pulled him as close as he could, ducking his head to kiss at Erik’s neck. He could feel the skin heating up under his lips, grazing his teeth down along Erik’s collarbone. The shudders only fueled him further, rolling over to pin Erik down to the ground.

He looked up at El, breathless. “Out here? It’s sure been a while since we-” He was cut off by El’s lips on his, sweet and demanding all at the same time. He pulled back for air, scooching down until he sat over Erik’s legs, his hands curling around his waistband. He looked up with a raised eyebrow, his eyes asking permission. 

When Erik nodded for him to continue he pushed his sleeves up, wrists oddly damp. He ignored that for now and focused on the matter at hand- turning Erik to putty with his mouth and hands.

Speaking of his hands, they were a lot more sweaty than normal. He pulled the hand that had been holding Erik’s hip back, a thin, clear string of liquid coming with it.

_What in Yggdrasil’s name?!_

Despite Erik’s vocal protests at the loss of touch, El sat back and dabbed a finger to the substance that was leaking from his wrist. It was oddly familiar. He touched his wrist to his mouth, wincing back at the flavor. 

_Lube_ _?_

Suddenly his arm jerked forward, fully extended. He felt a pressure build just beneath his skin, and when he tipped his wrist back, a stream shot out and onto the tree trunk behind them.

He got Erik’s attention, excitedly signing so fast he could barely keep up.

‘Okay so I have no idea what’s going on, but watch _this.’_

He extended his arm out the same way as before, and lo and behold another string of lube came shooting out of his wrist and into the bushes.

Erik stared at him like he’d turned into a grublin.

“What in the fuck. Was that?”

‘Yeah, I don't know either but it’s lube. So it’s useful.’

Erik sat back, still staring at El’s hands. “Huh.”

El rested a hand on his shoulder, his expression worried. ‘I know it’s really weird and I don’t quite understand it either. I’m sorry if this means you don’t want to, I-'

It took a moment for Erik to catch up on what he was saying, but once he understood he gently took El’s hands. “Listen, it’s...different, but we can work with that.” He pulled El in for a hug. “You come with plenty of quirks, and I love them all. Because they make you...you.”

They both jumped when Erik felt something wet hit his neck and slowly begin to slide down the back of his shirt. He pulled away from the hug to give El an accusatory look.

‘Sorry...I got excited.’

Erik grinned, pulling him back down to the ground. “Now _that_ I can work with.”

**Author's Note:**

> [Addy's Tumblr](https://omgitsaddyc.tumblr.com/)   
>  [Ned's Tumblr](https://nedrynwrites.tumblr.com/)


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